Hooked

The furore over the 'Net Generation' and the controversy surrounding Marc Prensky's Digital Natives theory prompted me to write a poem about gaming addiction that I actually performed at an ALT-C Conference. If for some perverse reason you ever want to repeat the performance, you need to dress up in a hoodie, and the crotch of your jeans needs to be hanging around your knees so that your boxer shorts are fully exposed (if you are indeed wearing any at all). You also need to strike a pose that is reminiscent of an old man suffering from constipation, and rap the words out loud and proud in a slightly nasal Estuary accent while flinging your hands around. Have fun. Er.... I know I did.

Hooked

I’m a digital immigrant, me
And the digital natives will be
Forever a stigma
Wrapped up in enigma
And shrouded in deep mystery

When he got his Nintendo DS
My son very quickly impressed
He linked with his buddies
And soon the young hoodies
Were wirelessly hooked (more or less)

Over time, his Nintendo obsession
Dragged us down to the depths of depression
Each attempt to suggest
A change or a rest
Was met with a wave of aggression

A Dad-imposed mandatory ban
Merely caused him to ‘go underground’
Soon we had to agree
The Nintendo would need to be
Surgically removed from his hand

I decided to check the Nintendo
And I slowly worked up to crescendo
Then it hooked me as well
And I soon looked like hell
I won’t even try to pretend-o

The brain training software was great
And I found myself staying up late
But I’ve now had my fill
And feel over the hill
With a brain age of 78

Image source

Hooked by Steve Wheeler is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Non-Commercial-Share Alike 3.0 International License.
Based on a work at steve-wheeler.blogspot.com.